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A New EverAfter

Your Story Unfolding

Spiritual Direction|Coaching Code of Ethics

Guidelines for Ethical Conduct

Source: Spiritual Directors International

I. The Spiritual Director and the Self

Personal Spirituality

1. Spiritual directors assume responsibility for personal growth by:

a. participating in regular spiritual direction

b. following personal and communal spiritual practices and disciplines

Formation

2. Spiritual directors engage in ongoing formation and continuing education by:

a. continuing to discern their call to the ministry and service of spiritual direction

b. nurturing self-knowledge and freedom

c. cultivating insight into the influences of culture, social-historical context, environmental setting, and institutions

d. studying sacred texts, theology, spirituality, psychology, and other disciplines related to spiritual direction

Supervision

3. Spiritual directors engage in supervision by:

a. receiving regular supervision from peers or from a mentor

b. seeking consultations with other appropriately qualified persons when necessary

Personal Responsibility

4. Spiritual directors meet their needs outside the spiritual direction relationship in a variety of ways, especially by:

a. self-care, wisely balancing time for spiritual practices, work, leisure, family, and personal relationships

b. recognizing and addressing the difficulties multiple roles or relationships pose to the effectiveness or clarity of the spiritual direction relationship

c. removing oneself from any situation that compromises the integrity of the spiritual direction relationship

Limitations

5. Spiritual directors recognize the limits of:

  1. energy by restricting the number of spiritual directees
  2. competence by referring spiritual directees to other appropriately qualified persons when necessary
  3. attentiveness by appropriate spacing of meetings and spiritual directees

II. The Spiritual Director and the Spiritual Directee

Covenant

  1. Spiritual directors initiate conversation and establish understandings with spiritual directees about:

a. the nature of spiritual direction

b. the roles and responsibilities of the spiritual director and the spiritual directee

c. the length and frequency of spiritual direction sessions

d. the compensation, if any, to be given to the spiritual director or institution

e. the process for evaluating and terminating the relationship

Dignity

2. Spiritual directors honor the dignity of the spiritual directee by:

a. respecting the spiritual directee’s values, culture, conscience, spirituality, and theology

b. inquiring into the motives, experiences, or relationships of the spiritual directee only as necessary

c. recognizing the imbalance of power in the spiritual direction relationship and taking care not to exploit it

d. establishing and maintaining appropriate physical and psychological boundaries with the spiritual directee

e. refraining from sexualized behavior, including, but not limited to: manipulative, abusive, or coercive words or actions toward a spiritual directee.

Confidentiality

3. Spiritual directors maintain the confidentiality and the privacy of the spiritual directee by:

a. protecting the identity of the spiritual directee

b. keeping confidential all oral, electronic, and written matters arising in the spiritual direction sessions

c. recognizing and disclosing to the spiritual directee the limitations of confidentiality of electronic communications

d. conducting spiritual direction sessions in appropriate settings

e. addressing legal regulations requiring disclosure to proper authorities, including but not limited to, child abuse, elder abuse, and physical harm to self and others

III. The Spiritual Director and Others

Colleagues

  1. Spiritual directors maintain collegial relationships with other spiritual care providers and professionals by:

a. developing intra- and interdisciplinary relationships

b. requesting a spiritual directee who is in therapy to inform his or her therapist

about being in spiritual direction

c. securing written releases and permission from spiritual directees when specific information needs to be shared for the benefit of the spiritual directee

d. respecting ministers, clergy, spiritual care providers, and other professionals by not disparaging them or their work

Faith and Spiritual Communities

2. Spiritual directors maintain responsible relationships by:

a. remaining open to processes of corporate discernment, accountability, and support

b. appropriately drawing on the teachings and spiritual practices of spiritual communities c. respecting the spiritual directee’s relationships to his or her own communities

Society

3. Spiritual directors, when presenting themselves to the public, preserve the integrity of spiritual direction by being in right relation with persons and organizations:

a. representing qualifications and affiliations accurately

b. defining the particular nature and purpose of spiritual direction

c. seeking opportunities to be spiritually available to the underserved

d. living in an ecologically responsible and sustainable manner

e. respecting all persons regardless of race, color, sexual orientation, gender identity and expression, age, religion, spiritual tradition, national origin, marital status, political belief, mental or physical handicap, any preference, personal characteristic, condition, or status.

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a.new.everafter

Bethany Ward | A New EverAfter
So what do *you* believe? Oh gosh, that is such a So what do *you* believe?

Oh gosh, that is such an interesting question for me. 

And I get it all the time.

I tend to refer to myself as a mystic. I believe that we all have the opportunity for direct access to, and union with, the Divine – and that those opportunities appear before us again and again, day after ordinary day. 

For me, the Divine is too expansive for any one expression, though I do have a personal relationship with the Mystery, of which I call God. 

I simply wish to live my life with that God revealing itself to me in new ways day after day. Sometimes that revelation is through Christian prayer, sometimes that is a reverence for nature, sometimes that is Zen Meditation, or attendance at Quaker meeting. Sometimes that revelation is a call toward social activism, and yes, sometimes it is a stir of a pot and a twinkle of my nose. 

When pressed, I might respond that I am a Jungian-influenced modern-day contemplative. 

All these varied practices represent, to me, a naturally resonant and responsible response to the glory of All That Is.

Though I dedicated the first part of my adult life, my academic career, and my profession to Unitarian Universalism, I am compelled to say that I currently do not have a religious affiliation. 
I simply choose to contemplatively and organically live out my spirituality, allowing the Being in All to make itself known in its multidimensional and multifaceted expression.

“ANY GOD I EVER FOUND IN CHURCH, I BROUGHT IN MYSELF.”― ALICE WALKER

Since my background is in Religion and Spiritual Development, I am able to translate diverse religious expressions into a deeply personal mystical experience that fuels my own understanding of the Divine and allows me to live a uniquely principled life tailored to my experience of a knowable yet unknowable God. 

This experience helps you too. I have an intimate understanding of many spiritual cultures and have a vast knowledge of where those traditions diverge and intersect. 

This approach helps you connect to your own beliefs and values as you consciously create your next chapter.

So...what do *you* believe?

#spiritualcompanionship #thisibelieve #faithstatement
It is difficult to describe what I do — in part It is difficult to describe what I do — in part because it is difficult to describe the breadth and scope of spirituality itself.

I often cheekily say, “I am a spiritual person...but not like that. Whatever the word “spiritual” has just conjured up for you...I’m not that.” ☺️

I jest this way because of how we individually and collectively [mis]understand the nature of spirituality itself. As it is largely [mis]understood, “spirituality” is everything from a moniker of the ego, to magical powers, to a flight of fancy.

I’m not that. 

Nor is true, authentic spiritual expression.

So what is authentic spirituality?

Academically speaking, the definition for “spirituality” is an “individual’s personal experience with wonder, awe, mystery, and/or connection to the whole.“. 

Simple as that. 

These are universal human experiences.

And...these universal experiences are in no way separate from the material. 

We are hardwired to connect. It is in our connection to ourselves, others, and All That Is that we find our deepest meaning and our truest fulfillment.

Spirituality encompasses all of what it means to be human. And to access and live from our spiritual sense is to be more fully—and happily—human.

Our innate spirituality asks of us:

“How shall I live my life?”

And...

“What values do I hold that will allow me to consciously create this life?”

In our modern world, we need someplace to go-and someone with whom we feel safe-to explore these big questions for ourselves.

This is the purpose of A New EverAfter —and the work that I do. I offer opportunities for your own deep learning and formative experiences that connect you to the most important aspects of who you truly are.

How do you personally define “spirituality”?

#authenticspirituality #spirituality #spiritualawakening #spiritualdirection #soulcare #spiritualcompanionship #liveconnectedlivewell
You asked: From where did 'A New EverAfter' derive You asked: From where did 'A New EverAfter' derive its name?

Each of us holds hope for our own lives’ unfolding. Yet we often encounter trials that instead leave us feeling disappointed and disillusioned. So many of us have encountered trauma, tragedy, and utter bewilderment and found ourselves saying, “it wasn’t supposed to be like this”.

A New EverAfter believes that we might restore our sense of hope by engaging in discovery and wonder, all the while remaining willing to follow the path toward true wisdom.

A New EverAfter does not promise a future that is nothing but bright nor made entirely of “happily”. However, it does know that trust in the process offers a true and lasting peace that can only come with engaging your spiritual nature.

Your spiritual nature may come to be understood through the intentional exploration of your own sacred story.

My desire is to help you enrich, reframe, and celebrate that narrative. No matter how you choose to explore your story within the varied services of A New EverAfter, together we will examine a new type of EverAfter, one that exalts the process and not the destination.

This EverAfter is not about a perception of a happy ending but about redefining your present and rediscovering who you truly are; mindfully, holistically, and practically. 

#spiritualdirection #spirituality #beginagain #hope #renewal #spiritualgrowth #spiritualjourney #authenticspirituality
I grew up in a fundamentally religious household - I grew up in a fundamentally religious household - as in Evangelical Christian Fundamentalist.

My parents were good, kind, loving, and gentle. ...But the religion I was steeped in was uncompromising, short-sided, and bigoted. 

As a child - with the limited perspective of childhood itself - I simply thought that this was how the world was constructed. 

That is, until I reached the curious age of 12 ....and heard the first chords of my first Indigo Girls’ song.

Instantly, my world expanded.

Where once condemnation, there was love. Where once judgement, now acceptance. Where once self-rejection, now self-understanding.

Those who expand our perspectives are the ones that have the most impact on us. The Indigo Girls invited me into a wider, more connected, and more loving world.

And....

this is exactly what Spiritual Growth does for us. It pushes out the walls of our existing containers and compels us to stretch further into love and compassion. 

Changes of heart facilitate spiritual growth.

Who has changed your heart?

Who has shown you how to push against the walls of your own narrow container? 

Who in your life has demonstrated their intent on making this place better for all people?

#spiritualawakening #spiritualdirection #spiritualgrowth #spiritualcompanionship #indigogirls #amyray #emilysaliers #getahammerandnail #letitbeme #shinemylifelikealight #letitring
The most important thing to me is spiritual growth The most important thing to me is spiritual growth because it gave me the true and lasting serenity I craved.

Learning how to engage intentional spiritual development has brought me out of my turbulent storms of overwhelm, disillusionment, and distrust.

In my darkest hours, bitterness and resentment had overpowered me. Yet, in choosing to get curious about my spiritual self, I found the tools that I needed for emotional repair. 

In time, I would recognize that my life’s circumstances could shape me into someone disconnected and cynical or I could be intentionally formed - through love - into the highest version of myself. 

Intentional spiritual growth has allowed me to reconstruct a solid foundation to finally come ashore to who I truly am.

#spiritualawakening #spiritualdirection #spiritualgrowth
In my years of serving Spiritual Seekers, I have u In my years of serving Spiritual Seekers, I have uncovered 5 foundations of spiritual living that foster deeper presence, lovingkindness, & continued growth. 

In the past weeks, I have been sharing each one individually and today we compile them into one comprehensive framework. 

While your spiritual life is unique to you, these foundations will be found in every person’s journey in some way.

1. Recognize the Promise: When we are in a state of disillusionment, we are disconnected from hope. Recognize that Presence is available to you and simply awaits your engagement.
2. Become the Calm Seer: In order to walk toward fulfillment, you must be willing to see things differently. Learn how to observe life in order to expand your perspective.
3. Know Your Spiritual Fuel: The Divine Spark ignites our souls in unique ways. Notice what aligns your heart and fuels your spiritual passion. Discover how to use your energies in expansive, not depleting, ways.
4. Understand True Worth: Not everything is meant for us. Learn the art of discernment by wisely evaluating the movement of your God-Source in your life. Come to know what is for you and what shall be offered up.
5. Move within the Knowable and Unknowable: Remain fluid in your spiritual growth. Rest in the ways that your God-Source has objectively demonstrated its love, protection, and guidance while remaining open to the wonder of discovery.

#spiritualseekers #spiritualdirection #foundationsofspiritualliving #spiritualformation #aneweverafter
The 5th Foundation of Spiritual Living is learning The 5th Foundation of Spiritual Living is learning how to move within the Knowable and the Unknowable.

Spiritual Direction helps us to remain fluid in our spiritual growth. It encourages us to rest in the ways that our God-Source has objectively demonstrated its love, protection, and guidance while remaining open to the wonder of discovery.

Spiritual maturity rests in faith’s assurance as it simultaneously distances itself from blind acceptance. 

A Spiritual Seeker is comforted by the guarantee of Divine Presence just as they acknowledge that their knowing is without certainty.

We have been implored to “Live the Question now!” by Henri Nouwen. “Do not now seek answers which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything.”

#spiritualdirection #inspirationalmedisumship #aneweverafter
Spiritual Direction helps you to understand the tr Spiritual Direction helps you to understand the true worth of things in order for you to live a meaningful and principled life of greater ease. To expand...

I am returning to a conversation around the Five Foundations of Spiritual Living after of a bit of a self-imposed detour. ☺️

We left off the conversation with the third foundation of Spiritual Living: Know Your Spiritual Fuel. 

Today, we return to it by examining the 4th Foundation of Spiritual Living: Understand True Worth.

Not everything is meant for us. Intentional spiritual growth helps us to learn the art of discernment by wisely evaluating the movement of our God-Source in our lives. 

Through therapeutic listening, you may come to know what is truly for you and what should be offered up. 

How many times have you been caught in a loop of your own thoughts, trying to determine a “right” course of action? A lack of skilled discernment can leave you frustrated and exhausted.

Through the art and practice of Spiritual Direction, A New EverAfter helps you learn how to discern with wisdom and to seek mercy and grace in the process. 

Consider where you might now be in unease in your life. 

Ask:

🍄 What personal value do I hold that I can live into more fully right now?
🍄 Which action brings me into further intimacy with myself? my God? Others?
🍄 Does this decision promote reconciliation rather than division?
🍄 Am I moving with trust?

Contemplating these questions on your own will guide you further on the path to wisdom. Yet, as Henri Nouwen wrote, “the companionship of trusted friends allows us to see how God is at work”. 

Working with a Spiritual Director ensures that you have someone companioning you through your discernment process so that you might move with greater confidence and gentler ease. 

#spiritualdirection #theartofdiscernment #aneweverafter #spiritualcompanionship
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